Louise Hay and me.

This morning I woke up,  and I didn`t want to.  For the how manieth (is that how you spell that?) day it is grey outside.  There is hardly a couple of minutes to open up for fresh air,  and the misty rain seeps through the port holes again.  And I can actually hear my invisible mold spores snugly floating in,  and I can actually smell the perfect thickness around me,  in my sheets, in my drawers.  And I can see the boys staying in their cabins,  trying to find something to do.  And I can see the washing heap growing every day,  and I can smell the stuffy towel,  in desperate need of sun!  Just like me...

Johan tried to cheer me up with my favouite `condensed milked coffee`,  the sweet thickness at the bottom inviting my finger to sweep the last bit into my mouth, but the grey stayed.  I wished for my stabile bed at Jura, after so many nights rolling around in a very busy sea, although at anchor.  Can you imagine balancing in bed?

Johan put on a dvd for us during breakfast,  and there was clarity in the grey.  This is why I am here,  in this grey,  on this boat.  Nowhere else will I have this opportunity to have grey time, to allow me to have grey time,  and to enjoy this grey time.  Because this is good.  In the grey it makes me clear...  In this grey I have the time to look myself in the mirror with no colorful distractions, to see me.  To take Louise Hay`s advise. To see me, and say...

This women, Louise Hay, is over 80 years old.  She came from a horrible family home, left by her father when she was little.  Her mother married an abusive man,  who started sexually abusing her at a very young age. Some more abuse followed her, until she ran away from home when she was 15.  She fell pregnant at 16, looking for any one to love her,  and gave the baby to a loving family.  She went back to rescue her mother from this man, and started her life.  Soon she realised the power of thoughts, and how little things started to change as soon as she changed her thinking.  In the mirror she stood,  and said to herself~ Louise, I love you!

So I went down to my cabin and I looked in the mirror,  and enveloped in the beautiful misty grey I looked at my reflection and said~ Marlene, I love you!

Must see movie "You can heal your Life (2007)" . With 9.1 out of 10 rating. Visit this link for more information about the movie.  http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1277154/